Wednesday, 18 May 2011

Broccoli on steam and then chocolate cake

Broccoli on steam and then chocolate cake / gym and then a cigarette to "digest" the sit ups / green tea (or at least Earl Gray) and then neat votka (ok let's not make it hardcore, maybe with a bit of tonic) /  bright pink and then elegant black / Tarkovsky's Sacrifice and then Sex and the City 2 / Dostoevky's Crime and Punishment and then Cosmopolitan (focusing on articles about sex and hmm...horoscope, although yes, I don't believe in this crap)... I can carry on forever, always loved contrasts in life.

You are in the bus and around you there is a whole society sample, like a miniature of the world. From the approximately 47 year old lady with huge red nails who is reading with religious devotion the Sun, to the teenager who is wearing his massively baggy pants soooo low that you have established every little detail of his boxer and from the hard working mother with the usually non-stop screaming baby in the high-tech pushchair, to the guy who has more tattoos than hair on his body.

Contrasts are everywhere, either in your own life or in the world. We just have to accept them, I guess. Why even fighting the fact that you  genuinely want to see the cheapest, tastless reality show on tv? If you feel like watching it, then so be it. No need for further explanations and in depth analysis. By the way, I am not talking personally now. I am not a fan of reality shows...ok I might have watched once and ok...the tv was on and I happened to be there...ok I am justifying myself now. But that's my point. I've been thinking that we tend to hide or justify our little pleasures or actions that don't match to our character or to whatever image we are showing.

And after these little thoughts, I am definitely eating that last piece of this shockingly delicious bunnofee pie which is still in my fridge. After all, I did go to the gym today and I haven't eaten a sweet for...oh...I am just gonna eat it.

Monday, 16 May 2011


im pos si ble
1. Incapable of having existence or of occurring.
2. Not able of being accomplished: an impossible goal.

"Impossible"... I have heard this word counltess times in my life. Definitely one of the most popular, well spread words. It's like a bitter candy in people's mouths or a sweet excuse for weak hearts. Sometimes, you hear it from the others as an obvious answer/comment to what you are suggesting.

For example: -"...and I might be nominated for an Oscar..."
                     -" Common, that's impossible!"

Some other times (and that's the most dangerous case), you say it to yourself.

For example: -"...and as I will be drinking my martini, sunbathing in my villa in Miami..."
                     -" Oh, hold on...that's impossible!"

I am using random examples, just to get to the point. On second thought, I could have used some others, deeper and more meaningful ones. Next time, I might come up with that of the man who was in a wheelchair and within a year, he walked again, started training hard and managed to compete in a Decathlon challenge! That would have been a more inspiring example indeed. Probably, I'm an ambitious. materialistic (but deep down sensitive) girl and I'm afraid, there is nothing I can do about it.

Anyway... "IM-possible". How can anyone allow a tiny little prefix to determine their lives? Why keep feeding so generously the rational, pragmatic side of our minds and let the other side (yes, I'm referring to the dreaming one) starve? I just can't imagine life without dreaming, fighting, moving...that's all. And I'm really surprised how so many people do so. Giving up their dreams and goals, just because "common, that's impossible". As if they have a second chance to try again. I'm not questioning now if there is life after death, that's a huge subject and obviously no one (including me) has an answer. And if anyone claims that they know for sure what's happening after life (or after death, I'm not sure which one is right), I'm sorry to say, but that's ridiculous. To put it mildly...

Life is what's happening now and that's all that matters. And as we only live once (let's take that for granted, as there are not other options really), it is better to make the best of it, I say. Being positive might be one of the most difficult things to achieve, but I have realised that when you get it, even the most tightly closed door will open for you. Without even having to push or knock. All you have to do is throw all these "impossible" rubbish out of the window first.

We are all born with a spark of madness and gradually we cover it under a more convenient rational suit, until it becomes dust and disappears in the closet of lost dreams.

I don't know why I'm saying all these. Maybe because I have been questioning myself lately, thinking if all this effort is worth it.  And then... And then I made a gin and tonic, with fresh lime of course. And then I took a deep breath. And then I stopped questioning or doubting. I'm just moving forward, never giving up. And that's it.

im pos si ble
1. One of the worst enemies of humans. Attacks insidiously people's hearts and eats them slowly. Usually accompanied by fear.
2. Extremely lethal to dreams.